Kunci: Bb major
Verse 1
G
It's horrible
One little evening alone, home
End up with carpal tunnel syndrome
Ab
And here I am,
G
known for giving heavy back aches
Grown and living off of Little
Debbie snack cakes
Supposed to be checking e-mails
Em
E
G
All All I got is messages from ass
Ab
Abm
naked females
G
I don't know a Jenny,
Verse 2
Ab
G
she said it's free and I won't owe her a penny
And that's the last time I saw her
Eb
But thousands of more horrors
Ab
on online Gomorrah
G
And Sodom
Ab
They got 'em with they curls out
G
And they got a better sales pitch
than the Girl Scouts
I wonder what I owe her
Eb
Ab
For a whole box of caramel coconut Samoa
G
Uh, ok honey, sweet dreams! Now it's time
to get serious like Peek Freans
A metal hand full, wipe it on the quilt
Em
E
Wife wake up and I'm
G
kill't over spilt milk
Ab
G
Locked in, looking at your picture
Fully clothed winter and I
right there wit cha
Thinking about the last time
I split your wishbone
A man could only wish you could
do the same 'til he get home
Ab
Fat chance
Eb
At least he get snacks
Ab
That will have to do 'til
G
a brother get back
Ab
G
Until then, smack One-Eyed Jack
Jack
Em
E
G
And hope one of his peoples can
hook him with a tri-pack
Ab
Abm
G
That's That's three
different flavors
Ab
G
Chocolate, vanilla, and strawberry wafers
Ab
G
Acting all hard,
'bout to get beat up
Em
G
I'll show him what time it is
Ab
once I get this sheet up
Abm
G
Soon as he fell off the beat down,
Ab
all I hear is
G
"Thirteenth cell get the sheet down!"
Ab
G
Damn C.O.
What the hell do she know
Em
E
Besides the fact she wanna
G
get dug out on the d-low
A workaholic with a fountain in the ink pen
Out in the mountains and
I stopped drinking again
In the wee hours he's gotten farther
E
Needing three showers,
G
Ab
being hot and bothered
G
The whiz with her legs bent, pregnant
Ab
G
God bless the day she wondered
where her egg went
I need a L, it's hard to drink without it
E
G
And could use some cookies but trying
not to think about it
Ab
Watching "BET" on jazz
G
for knowledge on file
Every other commercial,
college hoes gone wild
Soft batch, I prefer the other bunch,
F
E
like we got for lunch
Em
Chocolate fudge butter crunch
E
Em
E
G
Eb
C#
Eb
Verse 3
Ab
Abm
Ab
He don't mess with the Ritz Bits,
G
Ab
G
Wheat Thins, Saltines, or Triscuits
F
Matzos, or Cheez-Its
E
G
Catch sugar fits every time that he sees
Chips Ahoy,
Ab
double chocolate chunk
G
Something with the bubble
and the junk in the trunk
Ab
G
Even the Oreos
No matter what weather
F
Em
Always kept 'em dipped in
G
Ab
milk and stuck together
G
In the game he's shameless,
Ab
G
even uses a code name Famous Amos
Ab
G
It's cheaper than a short stay at the day's
Em
G
inn and good like 25 cent oatmeal raisin
Ab
E
G
Give a hand to who invented the camera
Ab
G
Skip past the graham
animals and grandmas
Ab
G
Shh, make sure she don't
E
wake from her dream chill
Em
G
Or get caught with a handful
Ab
of cream fill
G
"Oh, honey! What
Verse 4
Ab
are you do
G
ing? That's so nasty!"
It might seem ill
F
Em
G
"Ew! Go wash your hands!"
Ab
Cookies
Outro 1
G
F
Em
G
Ab
G
Em
G
E
Eb
E
Em
E
Ab
Eb
Ab
Eb
D
C
Eb
C
D
A
Ab
Eb
Ab
Eb
Ab
D
Ab
Eb
Ab
C
Eb
G
Ab
C
Eb
C
Eb
D
Eb
Ab
C
Ab
C
Ab
C
Ab
Gb
Ab
C
C
Eb
C
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